Fear
by storys217ph
Summary: Hermione gets expelled from Hogwarts. Pansy/Hermione story.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.**

**Fear - chapter 1**

**Hermione's POV**

I barge into my room in the Gryffindor tower slamming the door behind me. Fortunately none of my roommates are here. I'd probably kick them out otherwise. That is how angry I am right now, for I have just been expelled from Hogwarts, and for something that wasn't my fault. If only there was a way to prove it, I'll have to consider that before I give into despair which is already overwhelming me.

My heartbeat is slowing down as the feelings of injustice and anger is being replaced by realisation that I will probably never see this place again. I sit on my bed and stare at the ground. So suddenly, just like that, my whole plan has changed. I was to find a job, maybe as an auror like my fiends Harry and Ron had planed as well, but instead I'm being kicked out in this 5th year of Hogwarts. I won't be able to do anything now. I'll have to go live as a muggle.

I hop over to my trunk at the bottom of my bed. I rummage trough stacks of books and old scrolls, mostly junk I didn't have the heart to throw away as long as there's room. At last I spot a bright red cork in the corner. I pull out the heavy bottle of Ogden's Old Firewhiskey. It's been here a while, I can't recall when or how I got it either, but I've used it mostly for wounds. Not today.

I drop down on my bed and take a long sip from the bottle spilling some on myself. I can feel the firewhiskey burning my throat as it goes down and the aftertaste is god awful, but it will be worth the trouble if it knocks me out. I don't wanna be awake right now. I look around and realize I don't wanna be in here either when the others return. I want to be alone. I put on my jeans and my long sleeved flannel shirt. I tie my hair in a ponytail 'cause I'm just sick of it getting in my way. I grab the bottle of the bed and stumble over to the exit. I hold onto the wall as I feel a little bit dizzy already.

"Hi Hermione, where are you going?" My roommates Parvati and Lavender ask me as I rush trough the Gryffindor common room.

"Just going for a walk." I reply unable to hide how annoyed I am with their question.

I try to hide the bottle behind my thigh as I walk, but they spot it anyway and look at me wide-eyed. They must have not heard what happened, that's ok, they'll learn soon enough.

Do Harry and Ron know? I wonder as I descend down the long staircase. I'm sure they'd make some futile attempt or plea to headmistress McGonagall. I sure she wouldn't change her mind anyway. I rush out of the front gate onto the fresh air. It's sunset, I can see the blood coloured sky in the horizon, how appropriate. I feel a light breeze on my skin as I walk down to the lake, and it's the only thing making me feel good right now.

**Pansy's POV**

I don't know what brought me here, before the portrait of fat lady, before the wall so far. Any Gryffindor I asked refused to tell me the password, as expected. What was I thinking anyway? That they'd just welcome me? Most of them hate me for all I know. To the rest I am just another Slytherin with dubious motives.

I sit down on the stairs and rub my tired brow.

"Hey!" I hear someone and feel a hand on my shoulder.

"What?!" I snap, spinning around. It is one of the Gryffindor girls. I think I made fun of her once. She sure has no reason to be nice to me, but seams she's just like that.

"What's the matter?" She asks me with a caring voice.

"Could you do me a favour?" I ask quickly, before she changes her mind. "Could go in there and call Granger for me, I need to talk to her."

The girl looks at me surprised. "You want to talk to Granger?"

"Yes." I reply frowning. "So will you call her for me or not?!"

"Hmm… I pretty sure I just saw her walking down the hill." She says.

"Thanks." I reply and waste no time. I rush down the stairs and trough the empty corridors of the castle. I fall down on the stone tiled floor scraping my bare knee. "Fuck!" I cry out and rub some spit on my knee, just to quickly clean the wound. I keep on going. Second time today, I realize feeling the cut on my lower lip. But that was nothing, could have been a lot worse.

It all started with a stupid idea of mine, I was full of them actually, they kept me going trough those boring classe. That and making fun of anyone basically, even Slytherins were on the menu were they fat like Millicent Bulstrode or had some other easily detectable flaw.

I was bored one afternoon, so I snooped around the library, than I got and idea. I stole a book from the forbidden section, and who better to plant it on than annoying know-it-all Granger. She'd get busted for taking it and get detention or something and I could have a laugh about the prank with my so called friends, whatever, there's nobody smart as me around here, even if they are pureblood.

Only problem with my whole plan was, it didn't go as planed. That book I picked up was especially nasty. In fact I couldn't have picked the worse. I put it Granger's bag. She didn't notice a thing. Seams she found it in her bag only later, in potions class, -50 points for Gryffindor would be a nice bonus, I thought, only Snape wasn't looking her way. He gave us a task and was deep in thought over some parchment he was writing. All the while Hermione struggled to get the ropes off.

I faked a coughing fit trying to get Snape to look on the class, but that didn't work. "Sick again Miss Parkinson?" He asked lazily, not lifting his gaze from the parchment.

"No sir!" I replied quickly. I guess I had no credibility after faking sickness so many times to get out of class.

I looked over at Granger. Seams she got so intrigued, that she stopped making her potion and used her dagger to cut the ropes binding the book.

That's when all hell broke loose. When she opened the book some ghostly creature jumped out of it. It was ugly with a skull shaped face and horns sticking out the back of its head and shoulders, the lower part of the body was sort of non-existent. The thing looked like some evil genie from hell, only the sight of it could kill. Though it was transparent like a ghost it had claws that made very real cuts in the flesh.

In an instant the room was filled with screams and total panic. I got pushed as the crowd came running for the door. I fell on the corner of the desk thus cutting my lip. Blood come gushing out of it, but I felt no pain at that moment.

Unfortunately not everyone was as lucky, some people got hurt pretty bad. They were chased down by the creature before Snape managed to hit it with a spell. It flew away and up into the air, presumably in the direction of dark forest.

I sure hope everyone will be ok. Several students were now under the care of madam Pomfrey in the hospital wing.

Now I gotta find Granger and find out what's gonna happen to her, I heard she was called into Headmistress's office. I sure hope nobody can trace the book back to me.

End of ch1-


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.**

**Fear - chapter 2**

**Hermione's POV**

I sit down on the gravel beach on the edge of the lake and take another sip of firewhiskey from already half-empty bottle. How could I be so dumb to open that book? It had a skull carved onto its leather cover… I've seen strange symbols on completely harmless books before though, not that uncommon, but those firm ropes really should have been a clue.

If only I stopped to think and advised with a professor about it. I heard there was a special room in Hogwarts for handling dangerous items. I still don't know how it appeared in my bag. I'll guess I'll never know. Of course McGonagall thinks I stole it and madam Pince, the librarian confirmed that I was always moving about the library.

Strangely nothing happened to me even though I was closest. Some people got really hurt. Maybe it is best I got expelled instead of going to Azkaban or something. I could get a muggle job after all, and I would still keep in touch with Harry and Ron and the wizarding world, I tried to comfort myself, but it didn't work, the firewhiskey was doing a much better job. I drank more as it got darker and the moon and stars slowly appeared on the sky.

**Pansy's POV**

I wonder what keeps driving me further. I walk down to the lake followed by the howling from the distance. It's almost dark, it will be a cold spring night, and I have short sleeves and skirt. I keep rubbing my arms trying to warm up.

One question was bothering me more than the cold. What will they do to Granger? I wondered fearing that may become my punishment as well. I think nobody saw me take the book from the library. I'm not sure though.

Strangely I feel a bit guilty as well, I want to know the consequences of, sort of my actions. I've never caused anything this big. I mean, making fun of people never got anyone hurt, right?

The school is to blame, for keeping such a book in the reach of students. I'll advise Granger to use that argument. I just hope I don't draw suspicion to myself by doing this.

I thought my sense of guilt had dulled like any other feeling. For I lived in such a world where feelings were kept inside, were they not proper, and slowly you became that pretence you proclaimed to be. I was unaware of all this as life went by, but it greatly feared me that I could become like my parents, I didn't want that. In fact I want to tell the truth sometimes, but lying and sticking with the program is often just a lot easier.

Lost in thought I finally I spot a figure stretched out on the gravel. It's her!

I feet something stop me. I guess I could just walk away and deal with this in other way. Maybe it's best I keep my distance. A warm bath and bed sounds tempting right now… No! I burning to know more!

**Hermione's POV**

I hear light, careful footsteps on the gravel. I can't even see the person approaching me, things are getting blurry. "Who's there?" I yell out leaning on my elbow.

"It's me." I hear the girl say as she approaches.

I can see the outlines of black bob cut hair and a green streaked Slytherin tie. I frown and instantly feel a headache. "Parkinson… what the hell… *hic* …do you want?!"

"Granger?! You're drunk! Know-it-all mudblood drunk!" She exclaims snickering.

"Not drunk enough!" I say taking another large sip from the bottle and collapse on my back laughing. Everything is starting to feel a bit silly, like a weird dream. Parkinson showing up here, assures me it is more of a nightmare.

"Give me that! I think you had enough!" She says trying to take the bottle from my hands. What can be confused as care is probably a prelude to some joke of hers, I'm certain.

I yank the bottle back and it almost brakes on the gravel. "Come to kick me while… *hic* …kick me when I'm down Parkinson?!"

"Tempting, but I won't do that." She says. "Why are you drinking anyway? What did McGonnagall tell you?"

"Well… your wish came true. I'll be… I am, rather… *hic* …kicked out of Hogwarts! Yea… I got one week… *hic* …and goodbye. One mudblood less, right?"

She doesn't reply but only looks back at me with a mixture of shock and pity.

That makes me angry, I don't want her pity. "At least I won't have to look at your face bitch!" I try to stand up only to find out I can't keep my balance and I fall back down.

**Pansy's POV**

She can't even stand. I doubt a bookworm like her can handle alcohol. I for one have never seen her drink before.

After a bit of hesitation I rush over to help her up as she mumbles incoherently. She starts clinging to my skirt so I jump back, and as I do she sprawls over the gravel.

I panic and kneel down to check if she's breathing. I can feel her breath on my hand, looks like she just fainted into a deep sleep. It's best I leave now, it's dark and I'm freezing. Also the lake always scares me at night, seeing that black water on the moonlight, I have a feeling something will jump from it any moment, and the events of today are still vivid in my mind. I run off back to the castle.

End of ch2-


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.**

**Fear - chapter 3**

**Pansy's POV**

Granger wasn't at breakfast tomorrow, and I overheard Potter and Weasley talking, they were gonna go and look for her.

Thing is I know where she is, but I can't tell anyone, it would look suspicious. I decide to go check up on her after the crowd clears. I feel it's my duty, to at least check she didn't kill herself last night. I guess a year ago I wouldn't consider helping a mudblood, I must be getting soft. Oh well, I'll do it, even though I know she wont appreciate it.

I get down to the lake to find her throwing up. "Ughh.. disgusting!" I say and she looks over noticing me.

"Just leave me alone Parkinson!" She growls and crawls to the water to wash her face in the lake.

"Now that's even more disgusting! I wouldn't wash my face in that muddy water."

She picks up a stone off the beach and stands up on shaky legs. "I told you to leave me alone Parkinson or I'm gonna throw this stone right in your face!"

I take a step back and put my hands up, thinking she just might be pissed off enough to do it. "Jeez Granger, relax will you! It's not the end of the world you know. This place sucks, right? I wish it was me getting expelled…"

"How do you know I'm getting expelled?!" She asks furiously.

"Well, it's only reasonable to assume after what happened." I say. She obviously doesn't remember that she told me that last night, and I'm not in the mood to explain. "Anyway, why are you beating yourself up over it? You're lucky, you get to go and finish your school some place better, like Beauxbatons."

"I didn't know I could do that…" She pauses, thinking.

"Of course you can." I assure her.

"Wait, why do you care?! Why are you even here?!" She narrows her eyes, looking at me suspiciously and raises her hand, still holding a stone.

I take it she isn't really expecting an answer, but rather wants me to leave. "Fine, I'm leaving." I accept and head back up the hill. As long as she's alright, I don't care. It's not my problem anymore.

**Hermione's POV**

Good, she's finally leaving, I can continue throwing up in peace. As I'm about to put the stone down, I see one just like it flying from behind me. It hits Parkinson on the shoulder and she falls down on her knees from the force of the impact.

She cries out in pain and grabs her shoulder. "Are you fucking insane!?" She than turns around screaming.

"I didn't throw it I swear." I say defensively.

"Yes, but you wanted to." I hear and inhumanly raspy voice whispering from behind me. It sends chills down my spine. I turn around right away but there's nothing there.

"Who's there!?" I yell out spinning around, but I can't see anyone.

All the while Parkinson is staring at me, still crouching and holding her sore shoulder. "Who the hell are you talking to!? You really are crazy! I'm leaving, and you better not follow me, you hear!" She backs away gripping her wand.

Suddenly something grabs her and lifts her up in the air. She's trying to scream but can't, I can see the invisible squeeze marks around her neck and waist. She appears to be choking.

I immediately sober up. I'm in complete panic, and don't know what to do. Just as I reach for my wand the thing that's holding Parkinson appears. It's that demonic creature from the book, the same that I unintentionally released the day before. I look away at first, terrified by its ghastly visage, but I force myself to look again.

"What would you have me do with her master?! Choke her to death!? Drown her in the lake?!" The creature asks me, hovering over the lake with the helpless girl going more and more red in the face.

End of ch3-


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.**

**Fear - chapter 4**

**Hermione's POV**

I cast a few spells instinctively, but this demon manages to dodge all of them. I only made it angry, and it's only squeezing Parkinson's throat harder, I swear, she's close to dying. I panic even more, I must do something fast! "Don't do it! Please! Don't kill her!" I yell out, scared by how broken and fearful my voice sounds.

The demon chokes her harder to spite me. It looks at me with sinister expression showing no signs of stopping, than all of a sudden it drops Parkinson down into the lake and flies towards me. I am paralyzed with fear but it shifts invisible instead of clawing me. All I can hear is a chilling laughter passing over my shoulder and echoing towards the dark forest.

I look in the direction for a while, listening to every sound. Seams it's gone, what a relief. I wipe the sweat of my brow and turn around to see Parknson crawling on all fours out of the lake. I jump over to her. I hit her on the back to help her cough up water, than I step back and let her recover from there.

After a minute of sitting and coughing she stands up inspecting her completely wet clothes. She's looking paler than ever. I expect I do as well.

"Are you ok?"

She nods in response. "Let's get out of here! What if that thing returns?!" She says in panic and starts running up the hill.

"Yea, you're right." I realize and run after her.

"It called you master, are you controlling that thing?!" She asks me angrily as we climb up the hill.

"I'm not! I swear! Why would I…"

"Either way, we must inform the professor that thing is still out there. He'll know what to do."

"What professor?" I ask.

"Professor Snape, of course."

"Oh no! He would have me locked up and chained! I'm coming along so I can at least defend myself before you blow it out of proportion."

"Blow it out of proportion?! I almost died!" She screams. "Look at my neck!"

I really can see dark red marks on her neck as if done by a really thick rope. "Alright, sorry, let's just get there in peace."

We reach the castle, and go down to the dungeons. Than I had to wait for her to change out of her wet clothes, witch took me to the edge of my patience as I sat on the staircase wondering what other horrors are in store for me today.

Finally she returns wearing back shoes and skirt, and a white strawberry pattern shirt with a light green sweater over it. I raise my eyebrows surprised to see her out of her school uniform. "Come on, let's go!" She says.

We reach Snape's office in the dungeon without uttering a word. I'm already trembling from the sight of the black wooden door of the Snape's office. If I survive this day I should just pack up and leave right in the morning.

Parkinson knocks twice and after a moment Snape opens the door, looking down at us with his usual cold gaze. "Miss Parkinson and… Miss Granger." He looks over at me, surprised that I'm knocking on his door, and with one of his favourite Slytherin students. "You need something from me?"

"Could we talk inside professor, it's a serious matter." Parkinson says and we step inside. She than proceeds to retell the events just transpired, to professor Snape. I interject when necessary, hoping to prove I'm not the one controlling this demon like Parkinson keeps claiming. I'm just hoping Snape won't call dementors on me.

"I believe this a fear demon." Professor Snape says after a while and looks me in the eye. "It calls you master mockingly. The demon does what you fear Miss Granger. It can sense what you fear the most and feeds of that fear. Witch means you feared for Miss Parkinson's life… more than for your own." He finishes with that conclusion still staring at me.

I look to my left and Pansy is looking at me as well, obviously stunned by Snape's explanation. I feel gotta offer some sort answer to that. "I guess I was afraid if someone dies, I'll go to Azkaban, and that's worse than death."

"I suppose it can seam worse." Snape says, not hiding his disbelief. "In any case Miss Granger, it's seams you're not very fond of your life…"

"I bet professor Snape could help you with that." Pansy interrupts jokingly, prodding me with her elbow.

I don't find this sort of dark humor funny, in this moment in particular, and apparently neither does Snape.

"I don't make poisons Miss Parkinson, and even if I did, I wouldn't give any to my students… even Gryffindor ones."

"Sorry sir, just joking." She says quietly, blushing with embarrassment. It amazes me how quickly she managed to recover from that fear and panic. Joking like nothing happened… I'm still shaken up.

"As I was saying…" Snape continues. "To be sure of all this I must look up this particular demon, there is a book in the library describing these sort of demons in detail, offering solutions to rid of them as well. Here's what you must do, go to the library and find me that book, than I can I help you further. It's somewhere near the restricted section if I recall, but not in the restricted section." He makes sure to emphasize that. "Miss Granger, after all this I presume you won't venture there again?"

"But I never… alright, I won't." I accept.

"We'll find it, don't you worry sir." Pansy confirms going for the door and I follow.

"And hurry up! The demon leaves once it's sated and returns to feed again periodically. It could be only a day before it strikes again." Snape adds.

"Yes sir." Pansy says with a fearful expression as we exit Snape's office room.

We rush trough the empty corridors. "Shit, Granger we gotta hurry! I'm first in line if that thing comes back. Cause you got a crush on me or something?" She says glancing at me, as if it's just a rhetorical question.

Even though I hate her, I might have though of her a few times, in a purely sexual way, but I'll be damned if I'm gonna let her think she has some sort of power over me. "No! I don't have a crush on you! You forget, when the demon first appeared it attacked everybody but me, which means you're nothing special, you just happen to be there." Damn, I should have mentioned that back at the Snape's office, I realize.

"Oh…" She says disappointedly. Vain as she is, I must have shattered her illusion that the whole world is in love with her. "So it means you're just suicidal." She concludes plainly.

"Sure." I accept not willing to argue it further. It's not far from the truth anyway.

End of ch4-


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.**

**Fear - chapter 5**

**Hermione's POV**

"I'm surprised you know where the library is." I say when we reach the place.

"Hmm! Attempting to mock me Granger?!"

"No." I reply dishonestly, suppressing a smile.

"Good, you should know your place. Besides, it's only funny when I do it."

"It's not fun for the ones you're picking on though." I say seriously, hoping she'll understand how she's hurting people with her constant provocations.

"I'm sure people appreciate my sense of humor after a boring class."

I sigh, giving up. She's either evil or stupid, probably both.

"Let's get this done. Keep up!" She says running in front of me.

"Wait!" I say and we stop before the entrance. "Listen, I can do this myself, I don't really need your help to find this book. In fact I'm sure it will be slower with you around." I say frowning.

"No! Professor Snape is relaying on me to find this book, and no matter who finds it, I'm bringing it in, you got that!?"

"Yea, whatever, I don't really care what Snape thinks of me." I accept realizing I won't be able to get rid of her that easy.

We walk trough the open double doors inside the library.

"Wait right there!" Madam Pince yells out, jumping up form behind her desk.

"You! Granger!" She yells pointing at me.

"Yes?" I ask confused.

"Get out! You're banned from the library! Headmistress McGonagall's orders!"

"But I…"

"No buts! Turn around and out you scoundrel!"

This woman was always nice to me and now she just called me a scoundrel. It seams unreal, but I guess I have no choice.

"And you Miss…?"

"Parkinson, I'm a Slytherin, fifth year." Pansy finishes.

"You can go in, I'm sorry I had to yell." Madam Pince says and goes back to her table while I stare hopelessly from the other side of the library door. Even though she seams motivated, I doubt Parkinson will be able to find the book. The library is huge and she probably doesn't know it well. I better go call Harry and Ron for help.

"Granger, wait!" She says as I'm about to leave. "Follow me!" She orders rushing trough the corridor.

"Follow you where?" I ask following.

"I know a secret passageway to the library." She says quietly. "I've been going around exploring the castle, I swear it's the most fun you can have around here." She explains.

"You're just too good for this place, aren't you?" I tease a bit.

"Damn right!" She says seriously as if she didn't pick up on my sarcasm.

We walk a few corridors turning only left and reach a wall. She taps the wall a few times and it opens up a narrow gap in the wall. It reveals a very narrow passageway. Someone with a belly or big boobs couldn't pass for sure, but we both manage to squeeze through quite easily.

Only seconds later we emerge in the far end of the library, right where we're supposed to look for this book. It's secluded as well as fenced off by tall shelves that reach the ceiling. I sure hope Madam Pince doesn't come by here.

"There, told you I knew a way in." Pansy says proudly. "I'll take a little nap." She sits at the desk and yawns lazily. "…so let me know when you find it, alright."

I'm pretty sleepy myself, now that all the adrenalin rushes have passed. And I'm still a bit groggy from firewhiskey as well. No way, I'll stand for this. "Listen! If you want the credit for finding the book, you better at least pretend you're looking for it!" I snap.

"Fine!" She snaps back and goes to the bookshelf, furthest from the one I've picked to start with.

I get on the ladder and start from the top downwards. Pretty soon I realize this part of the library isn't really sorted well, different kinds of books are mixed up here, no other way but to go one by one. I give Pansy directions how to search for the book and strangely enough she does as I say, or at least tries to.

Hours later we're both extremely tired and Pansy caves in first. "I can't stand this anymore! My eyes hurt!" She complains falling down on the chair. "And I'm so damn hungry!"

"Alright, let's take a break." I accept and sit at the desk myself.

"I'll go get something to eat." She says and walks to the corner of the room. "Don't worry, I'll return." She says before disappearing into the secret passageway.

"Don't bother." I whisper to myself after she's gone. "So useless anyway, should have just let her… sleep…" I say yawning and I put my head down on the desk. I close my eyes for just a second. The hard wooden desk feels like the fluffiest cloud right now.

**Pansy's POV**

I return to the passageway, barely passing trough with a big plate in my hand. "Hey I got…" I stop seeing Granger asleep on the desk. I take a seat next to her and set the plate down on the table.

I take a closer look. She looks so peaceful, like fifty cannons couldn't wake her up. I've got to discipline my mind, it wants to think of her in that way again. I feel disgusted by myself every time I do, and a traitor to my pureblood lineage.

I guess I should wake her up, we got work to do, but before I do that… I have an idea.

End of ch5-


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.**

**Fear - chapter 6**

**Hermione's POV**

I wake up and my vision slowly blurs in as I'm blinded by the light. I want to breathe but I can only do so trough my mouth for some reason. I reach for my nose and pull out two crumpled pieces of parchment stuck in my nostrils.

"What the hell…?!" I exclaim throwing the improvised nose plugs away. I hear laughter next to me and turn to see Parkinson's snickering face.

"Well, that was fun." She says wiping the tear of laughter from the corner of her eye.

"Don't do that again!" I say in a calm but threatening manor.

"Pfff… you're always so serious, so boring. Try and have some fun…" She goes on mumbling, sliding a big plate in front of me.

"What's this?"

"Strawberry cake, I saved you a slice." She says.

I usually avoid shugary stuff like this, but I'm as hungry as hell. Last time I ate must have been a whole day ago, not to mention I threw up everything from day before and my stomach is completely empty and it won't be ignored. Instinct takes over and I grab the fork of the plate and stick it in the tasty looking strawberry cake. "Wait!" I manage to stop myself. "Did you put something in this?"

"Give me that!" Pansy yanks the fork from my hand and cuts off a corner of the slice with it. She puts a mouthful in and starts chewing. "Happy?" She asks, handing me back the fork.

"I guess." I say and wipe the fork on my shirt thoroughly, catching a sour gaze from Pansy. As if she wouldn't do the same.

Finally I dig in. The cake tastes heavenly and I stuff fork after fork in my mouth, and the plate is clean before I know it.

"Wow! Granger you ate that in record time!"

I wipe my mouth with the sleeve of my flannel shirt that's already been trough a lot today. "You could have brought a napkin."

"Well soooorry!" She exclaims sarcastically.

"The cake was great though." I say honestly, not wanting to be completely ungrateful.

"It's from bakery here in Hogsmeade, it's good but you should try the cakes my grandma makes, now those are flawless, we always have one for desert after Sunday dinner."

I'm surprised she's talking to me about her family, it feels strangely uncomfortable. For someone who's been unfriendly for so long especially. "Cut that out!"

"What?" She asks confused.

"That! Why are you acting nice, what do you want? Talking to me about your family all of a sudden, I don't buy it!"

I observe her expression change upon saying that. "What did you think, I was gonna call you over for dinner at my house? A mudblood at our dinner table? That would be a disgrace. Not in a million years!" She exclaims with a bitter scowl.

I actually regret saying that now, she shifted back to her usual self, just like that. I wonder if she really feels that strongly about it, or just responds when provoked. I get a strong urge to ask. "What in particular do you all hate about muggleborn?"

She pauses for a moment, stumped by my question. "I'll tell you what!" She says angrily. "Cause you're all a simple, greedy lot. And you want to claim more and more leading roles in our wizarding society. You're pushing us out! Us, who are the true connoisseurs of knowledge and power!" She says proudly, but I can sense it's a line repeated and rehearsed.

"I don't know who told you that, but…"

"Who ever did was right!" She cuts me off angrily. "I can see that clearly now, after spending just half a day with one of you people."

"You mean me?"

"Yes. You-know-who had the right idea wanting to get rid of you lot."

She actually said that. I shake my head in disbelief. "I can't believe you're mentioning that monster in any sort of positive sense. Even form you, I didn't expect that." I say getting off the chair, going for the tall bookshelf to continue my search. I can feel her stare on the back of my head.

"I'm leaving!" She says picking up the empty plate of the table. "You know I really wanted to help you! But now…"

"Yeah right, you wanted to help yourself, and get the pat on back from Snape in the process. Helping me is probably the last on the list."

"Still, I wanted to help, but now I don't care what happens to you!" She says angrily but with a shaky voice. I wonder if this is really affecting her.

I don't respond, but with a sigh. I really don't need this unnecessary drama and quarrel right now.

She turns around and taps the wall with her wand a few times. The passageway opens. "I hope that demon kills you! I couldn't care less!" She snaps and proceeds to squeeze trough the narrow passageway like some agile cat.

Damn! Why did that actually hurt? I stand there thinking while the wall closes up making a low soothing noise of stones rubbing against each other. "Wait!" I yell running to it, but the wall closes before I can get there.

I slam my fist against the cold, unyielding stone wall. Shit! She didn't tell me how to open up the secret passageway out of the library. That was the first things I should have asked while things were going somewhat well. Should have known something like this was bound to happen.

This means I can't get out without being seen by Madame Pince. Damit! I'll have to try and sneak out somehow, but not before I find that book! Being kicked out seams less and less terrible to me, my main objective now is getting rid of that demon that seams to be haunting me. I do not want to see that thing again!

**Pansy's POV**

My father often tells me; Pansy, don't mix relationships and politics! I guess he was right… What am I saying?! Relationship and Granger, now those two words don't mix, if you can even call complete and utter antagonism a relationship. I'm spending way to much thought over this, I bet she just went about her day as if nothing happened. I feel tears coming.

I try to hold them beck and think of something else, but I come up blank. I rush into the closest empty bathroom and lock myself in one of the stalls. I put the seat and the cover down. I put the plate with the fork on the tiled floor and let go of my restraint. I sit down and start crying, burying my face deep in my hands.

What's wrong with me? Why the hell am I crying over this? Whatever! I say to myself, wiping my cheek. She'll be out of here in less than a week, I realize, so I won't have to see her again, probably ever. Instead of comfort, this makes me start crying again, even more than before.

I manage to calm down after some time. How can so many things go wrong in one day? I wonder feeling the painful streak on my neck that I got this morning, when I was nearly choked to death. I need to just forget about everything and recover, I realize. I should just go to bed, screw everything. I feel so emotionally drained. I'm sure I'll fall asleep in a blink.

I pickup the plate of the floor and exit the stall. I throw it in the garbage bin along with the fork. It was my favourite plate, but I don't want it reminding me of this day, of how weak and stupid I feel right now.

End of ch6-


End file.
